Holistically Inclined

When I moved to the LA area for college, I began attending a local church whose ways seemed different than any I had experienced before. Mothers breastfed their children in the pews, potlucks consisted of healthy choices–including clearly-labeled vegetarian options, and not much make-up was worn. It was refreshing. But back then, even though I felt like I ‘belonged’ there, I still had a long road ahead of me.

I began babysitting for one particular family whose daughter was a toddler. When they interviewed me, they took me on a tour of their home and explained a bit about their parenting style. The child was only allowed to watch 10 minutes of TV per day, she was given choices about nearly everything, and she still slept in her parents’ bedroom. I really thought this family was wacky and I struggled a bit figuring out how to interact with such an empowered and secure child.

As I spent more time at the church, getting to know more people, I discovered that many of the families in attendance parented in this same manner. On one defining Sunday, the Adult Education hour was dedicated to parenting based on the books by the Doctors Sears (The Baby Book, The Attachment Parenting Book, The Breastfeeding Book, to name a few). Having never heard of these doctors or their books, my curiosity was piqued and I began to research. I was finally able to understand and started to internalize what I had witnessed with the family I was babysitting for. The children growing up in that family and the others in my congregation were imaginative, caring, adventurous, and much like I imagined my own future children to be.

When I did marry and have children several years later, my holistic journey had already begun to accellerate. By that time, it was a no-brainer that we would co-sleep, breasfeed and eat healthily. It did seem, however, that I was beginning to surpass many of my initial teachers. I not only wanted to cloth diaper, but to use Elimination Communication–essentially beginning toilet training in infancy. I not only wanted a natural birth, but a homebirth. I not only wanted to find a doctor who was open to delayed/selective vaccinations, co-sleeping, extended breastfeeding, etc., but one who encouraged these things.

Now my journey consists of learning more about food–growing it, buying it, preparing it, using it medicinally, etc. While I can now easily say that attachment parenting comes completely naturally to me, I am still having to make a conscious effort to make the right food choices for myself and my family. Our most current work-in-progress? Juicing greens and veggies at least twice/week.

Over the last eight years or so I’ve undertaken the slow and steady task of becoming more holistically minded. I suppose my upbringing was where my holistic journey really began, but the ways were subtle and did more to shape my way of thinking than to lend me many specific practices.

My mother is a product of a rough upbringing. She is one of those who chose to make the best of life–using her experiences to help others–rather than wallow in the bitterness and anger she certainly must have experienced. She is independent, freethinking and always encouraged me that I could do whatever I put my mind to. When she married just two months shy of my eighth birthday, she had already firmly established herself in a high-paced career despite being a single parent. She later birthed my siblings, at first determined to do it without the use of hospital interventions or drugs–even choosing to deliver at the hospital’s birth center. But due to their stubbornness to come out, both my brother and my sister’s births were induced which began the spiral of interventions and she ended up delivering both with epidural anesthesia. Still, she breastfed them both for about a year and a half–longer than most were doing at the time. And although she chose disposable diapers, she did use cloth wipes.

I have taken each of these decisions a step (or two) further than my mother did–birthing my children with midwives at home,  breastfeeding much longer, and exclusively using cloth diapers while also practicing EC (Elimination Communication)–and have made many other changes in our lives that lead us toward better health in mind, body and spirit.

My mother has laid the foundation for me to be in the place that I am now. And while she doesn’t agree with all of my choices, I know she is proud that I am seeking the best for my family–and doing it in a bold way. Won’t you join me as I share my journey and all that I have learned–and continue learning–in this public forum?